We Can Only Gain When We No Longer Fear to Lose
Parshat Bamidbar, 5767 (by Rabbi David Lapin)
Anyone unwilling to make himself into an ownerless
desert, cannot master wisdom and Torah
- Bamidbar Rabbah 1:7
Heroic Courage
This week I was training leaders in one of the largest police Agencies in the United States. I found myself in the presence of an impressive group of medal-bearing courageous men and women who many times in their careers had placed their lives at risk to protect the communities they serve. Courage was not a challenge to them. It was a precondition of their work. Yet time and again during our conversations, these men and women asserted their reluctance to take a stand on a variety of troubling ethical issues within their agencies, for fear of career-limiting and possibly career-terminating, consequences. Courage means overcoming fear in the face of potential pain or loss. I realized working with these Commanding Officers, that we often display more courage in the face of physical pain, loss, and even death, than we do in the face of emotional pain, disapproval, rejection or loss of status. Strong, courageous, macho men will sometimes hesitate to call a girl for a date, for fear of rejection!
Moral Courage
It is harder to have the courage of your convictions than it is to risk your life in an heroic act. The courage of your convictions requires that you be willing to adopt a viewpoint that perhaps no one else does. To stand for a principle that no one else will stand for. To defend an individual or group of people who are the victims of popular, vicious attack. In doing so you may lose your friends, lose your status, even your job. In a society that values popularity as much as America does, having the courage of your convictions could entail enormous loss and much pain. Unlike one who risks their life to save a person, there is no heroism attached to one who displays moral courage to defend a principle or to oppose injustice. The Prophets of the Tanach were often maligned for their moral courage, and things have not changed much today.
How do you build moral courage? You build courage by detaching from the things you are afraid to lose. You can only act courageously in a life-threatening situation if you are at that time, not afraid to die. Attachment to life undermines courage and causes us to retreat in the face of danger. Of course, the drive for survival is any organism’s most basic instinct. But as in the case of all instincts, humankind, unlike animals, can choose to overrule its instincts in given situations and act from a position of values rather than of instinct. No matter how hungry we are, we can choose to hold ourselves back from eating food that is not ours or that is not kosher. In that same way we can choose to act courageously, temporarily severing our attachment to life as we risk life to do that which we believe is right.
Letting Go in Order to Hold on
Similarly, for moral courage we need to detach ourselves from status, from the need for social structure and popularity, from the desire for public approval and promotion within the system. Counter-intuitively, those willing to lose their jobs rather than compromise the essence of who they are, are more likely to rise to the top. Those willing to risk their popularity to stand for that in which they believe, are likely to be the more popular and respected individuals in the longer term.
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